How would you like to know one simple way to make anyone like you, or if they already like you, like you more? This isn’t in the romantic sense, although more platonic liking has, of course, been known to evolve to that.
It really doesn’t take much… there are four steps involved, but all of them are easy, particularly since (presumably) you already are interested (again, not necessarily in the romantic sense) in that person. None of the steps should take very long, either, although we’re not just talking about a couple minutes, either.
So what is this way that I’m talking about? What is the one thing that is virtually guaranteed to make someone like you, or like you more?
It’s easy… let them teach you something that kindles their interest, or better yet, their passion. For example, you could ask me to teach you something about writing (one of my passions), or about web development (one of my interests), and you will very nearly automatically have my attention.
The four steps involved in making anyone like you:
Find Their Interests
The first step is to find out what their interests and/or passions are. Without this knowledge, you’re going to be rolling the dice… whatever topic you bring up may or may not interest them, and if it doesn’t, your net result may be negative, other than making them aware of you if they were not before… but never underestimate the power of someone being aware of you. If you can find them out, and you really should be able to do so, you’re starting with an advantage.
Learn A Little Bit About One (or more)
Now that you have completed step one, choose one or more of their interests that also sound interesting to you. It’s even better if it’s an interest that you already had, but regardless, don’t fake it. Faking interest in the area can definitely work in the short term, but you can only keep faking it to a certain point, and once you pass that point, the person you want to like you may feel more negative feelings toward you from being used/manipulated/deceived than you ever generated in positive feelings.
Once you have chosen the interest(s) you want to concentrate on, learn something about them. If you were already interested, you may have this part already accomplished. If not, don’t worry about acquiring in-depth knowledge, all you need is to learn enough to know how to ask questions about it.
Bring Up The Subject
Now that you know enough to ask questions, find a way to bring up the subject with the person. There are an almost infinite number of ways to do this, but make sure it doesn’t sound artificial. It can be as simple as using a news story that has some relationship, drop a hint that you are doing something related to it (ie if you want to bring up writing with me, you might mention something that you are writing/have written), or just point out something that reminds you of it (if the topic of interest is dogs, and you see a cloud that sort of resembles one, you can use that). It doesn’t really matter how you bring it up, as long as it doesn’t sound forced.
Ask Them To Teach Or Explain Something
Now that you have brought up the subject once, it will be easier to bring up again… you can say something like “I was thinking about what you said the other day…” and it’s natural and brings up the subject again. It also makes it easy to move on to this step… you just add “and I was wondering ” along with “what you think about x”, “what you meant by y”, “how you learned z”, or anything else of the sort… making it into a question about them and their knowledge. If the area of interest is one where they might be considered an advanced amateur or a pro, you might ask them to teach you how to do something in the field. If they are more beginner or just moving to amateur, you might do better asking them what they think about something in the field. Whatever their status in the area, you’ll usually do well by asking what they think about a specific piece of recent news that involves or is related to that area of interest.
There really are a lot of ways you can go with this, but the idea is to get them talking about something they care about, something that also is of interest to you. Once they start talking, just sit back and listen, encouraging them sometimes, possibly injecting some additional information or expanding a little on something they said where you are in agreement, but mostly letting them do the talking.
I mentioned at the beginning of this article that one way to make anyone like you is to ask them to teach you something. Notice that I said “teach”, not “tell”… that’s because you have to actually listen, pay attention, and learn what they are teaching. That’s also why I said you need to pick something in which you are genuinely interested… if you are only faking interest, it’s going to require a LOT of investment of your energy to continue to pay attention and learn. And the amount of energy it takes is only going to go up as you go along, thus bringing you to the point where you can no longer fake it.
So, there you have it… a simple way to make anyone like you. Use it in happiness and health.